Posts Tagged ‘Life’

Intro: The Third Chapter. This one is a continuation of the story. A very important one for later on.

1st Chapter: https://silentscholar.com/2016/03/15/once-upon-a-time-chapter-i/
2nd Chapter: https://silentscholar.com/2016/03/22/chapter-ii-a-sisters-faith/

Chapter III – Confliction

His mind is redrawn through the words of “God”…
Not realizing that the hands of man are behind his awakening…
The source of light is something so dark that threatens to tear him apart….
A little “note” pulsates through his mind and soul…
Trying to connect the past and present to these enshrined goals…
Bring peace to this world through practicing and preaching this way of peace does little to put at ease the
little boy within him…
So the conflict strengthens….
Am I committing sin?
Is what I’ve been taught to think the way to be a better person?
The little boy who has witnessed so much pain…So much sorrow…So much happiness…
Now must decide where to gravitate…While the surrogate father salivates at the thought of another soldier
being added to the ranks…

Little boy is told to give his last thanks to those he loves…
Takes one long drawn out look at the sky and wonders on the perils of life…
The slow steps to paradise…
Each step reminds him of his duty to his faith…
Yet at the same time doubt has settled in…
Won’t let go…
Surrogate father restates the goals…
“The only way to enter the eternal abode!”

Yet she prays too…
She prays…She prays…
Then came this day…
Did her faith save her?
Husband comes home and strokes her skin…
So softly she feels loved for the first time…
But intertwined with this kindness is the lie his eyes hide from his wife….
He has news from her father…
The choice has been made…
For his debts to be paid she must be made a “slave”…
She can’t believe what’s been said…
Before she could make a sound, she’s bound tight by her husband…
Her brother joins in remaking into what the slavers taste…
She screams…
“I’m your sister!”
“How could you do this to me!?”
Her brother’s cold face shows what phase he has reached…
The brainwashing has been complete…
He himself is a mental slave….
She now turns pale as they turn her over to the menacing males…
Have her prayers failed…?
She prays…She prays…

Intro: I had neglected to actually give context to Chapter I and what the story is about. Truth be told I hope I’ve left enough clues for it to be known. This chapter focuses on the sister in this story. Much of the inspiration came from a Nashville, Tennessee based band named Hammock.

This song in particular inspired this writing:
“The Silence”

Their website:
http://www.hammockmusic.com/

I try to draw inspiration from many places as experiment. This song in particular really is something…

1st Chapter: https://silentscholar.com/2016/03/15/once-upon-a-time-chapter-i/
And so it continues…

Chapter II – A Sister’s Faith

I see…
A beautiful woman…
Hides her face…
She refuses to tell…
So I’m forced to dwell in my thoughts…
Caught in my own sense of lost time…
I fail to realize that her story is being told through those eyes…
Peel back the layers of disguise…
Her eyes tell me so much…
Her Faith…

When she was young, she was betrothed to an animal…
Whose mandible dripped lust…
Spoke corrupt…
Each thought erupts as if the thought of being stuck with this animal was enough…?
No…She had to bear more…
A father who who struck her at his own whim…
“Let he who is without sin cast the first stone…”
The community refused to own their own…
For all had sinned and refused to partake in the righteous deed of helping to set her free…
So she was left alone…
Waiting to be taken away from the only home she’d ever known…

Now she’s with the animal whose rage could no longer be caged within the confines of his brainwashed soul…
The vote that his soul took was to be the tyrant of the household…
Each night the case closed with him violating her in shadows….
One wonders if she could even consent to this act…
With the pretense that she would face his wrath if she didn’t oblige…
Still to have a child is the content of many a women’s dreams…
To comment on the means to achieve this dream should be a travesty…

He pierced her hard…No love exchanged…
Just the excrements…
Much to the detriment of what the relationship should’ve been…
This was just the beginning of the many ordeals she would endure…
Yet it would be faith that kept her feeling secure…
A belief in a better day…
Yet…As the fluids keep flowing, loud sounds unaccompanied by the serotonin…
The seed is released…Deed is done…
In 9 months we should see the newborn…

She is now with child…Yet still her life is still an unending trial…
“Husband” is vile all the while the child grows…
The child can hear the fights that happen day and night…
He shakes…shakes…
She feels the pain…Red from the abuse husband the lays onto her beautiful face…
The baby feels her pain…Continues to shake…
Released… many weeks before he was due, due to the pain inflicted as he grew within her womb…
Born too soon…
He struggles to breathe…Mother can’t believe what she sees..
He came too early into this world to be saved…Soon after he’s laid to rest…
Wife now faced with the blame…
“You can’t carry my child!?”
“You’re weak and worthless!”

He continues to beat his wife in plain sight of the community with such impunity that he seems to be the only judge and jury…
Husband marries again…
Continues and unjust trend of unrepentant hate towards this sister in faith…
Cutoff from all her family and friends, she’s forced to dwell in this hellhole that’s also her home…
But in reality her husband “owns” her…
All she has is this corner she uses to pray for a better day…
For she is not so quiet after all…
On her knees…
Praying to the Lord to please let her be free…
All done in secret…

Intro: An older more heavily hip hop style song. A time when rhyming was more of a focus than the content itself.

An interesting monologue/conversation.

Hey…
I can’t believe this is you…
Can’t believe this is the truth…
Can’t believe you grabbed that knife…
Can’t believe you wanted to end your life…

Could believe you threw your knife down…
could believe your life was found…
Could believe you’ve found brighter days…
Could believe you’d find your way…

Can’t believe you kept spiraling down…
Can’t believe you thought life was done…
Can’t believe you grabbed that gun…
Could believe that gun had blanks…
Thank the Lord…
Thanks…

But here you are lying in a hospital bed…!
No one knew of this life you led…!
Stuck with all these tubes…
This is not how I’d pictured you…
Bloodied shirt…
Feel so hurt…

Can’t believe you didn’t tell me…
Can’t believe that we weren’t homies…
Can’t believe you wrote such harsh words…
Can’t believe you wanted us all cursed…

Could believe we were drifting apart…
Could believe it was because of my cold heart…
Could believe I wouldn’t understand…
Could believe that I still want to be your friend…

Could believe….
Can’t believe…
Could believe…
Can’t believe…

Can’t believe they want me to let you go..
Can’t believe I’ll now be all alone…
No homie to hang out with…
No more laugh out loud moments…
Enough…!
No one is hearing me…!
Who am I!?
Who is this!?
We got the same slit wrists…
Not it can’t be..!
You are me…!
I did the deed…!

Intro:

One of my earliest attempts at writing a story spanning multiple songs. Inspired by instrumental Raujika – Fairy Tale: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d4AhdzxFung

A total of 3 chapters were written with a 4th one on the mind, but for years I left the story unfinished. Until I stumbled across this gem from one of my favorite composers on YouTube: July – 되돌아가다

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lCW_6ON33aU

I expanded it to a total of 7 chapters to complete the story. However I feel that there can be much more added as side stories and/or character studies. This is territory I’m not so familiar with lyrically, but have always wanted to take part in. I’ve changed my writing style over the years and that will be reflected greatly as more chapters are posted.

I’ve also written smaller stories in songs before such as Intensity:

https://silentscholar.com/2015/07/28/intensity-story-in-a-song/

But this is different. Hopefully it’s a worthy attempt on my part; certainly a heartfelt one for sure.

And so begins…

 

Chapter I – Little Boy’s Story

Once upon a time there was a little boy who wanted to go to school…Wanted to be something…Wanted to be a doctor…Wanted to help…Wanted to do good…

Father was farmer…Who’s Karma should’ve meant he would prosper…Instead the land lay decrepit…Father’s cheerful remarks remain tepid…Seems he stepped in too deep…Too poor to make ends meet…Dust lays under his kids’ bare feet…Dustbowl repeats…Is this the only life they will see? What a tragedy this story may turn out to be…

A man shows up to father’s “home”…Wanting to take all that father owns…Failed to pay back the loans…Little boy doesn’t understand the angry rants that the father must stand to hear…The Man leaves…Father stares…Little boy wonders…

While this little boy watches his father toil…The soil decays…It seems there is no way…Each day the sun’s rays seems to burn the family that still prays for rains…Physically drained…yet everyday they still pray….spiritually starved…How hard are their lives…? Once again that man appears…strikes fear in the father’s eyes…Tells his kids to go inside and be with mom…Through the paper thin walls, they can hear the sounds…As the father hits the ground…Stained with blood from the bruises and cuts he suffers at the hands of this merciless other…

Little boy goes to the local place…Tries to strengthen his faith through patience and prayer…Some of those around proceed to say that there is a way…As he listens closely…

There is a way to gain an education…Put food on the table…Finances to keep the family stable…Almost sounds like a happy fable…With a moral that says faith rewards us all…Stay Strong! Stay Strong!

That’s what the teachers say…Nothing more amazing than seeing that smile on the little boy’s face…Knowing today he could stuff his face full with food with no bills due…No more loan sharks…The days that were so hard are in the past…With the math and reading the little boy’s face is teeming with light and hope for the day in which he could serve his community and his Lord in the right way that’s personified through his dreams…Wishing he could help those with few, if any means…Such an innocent boy with so much hope…

Every day he goes home and smiles…Father can’t believe his eyes…Their prayers have finally been “realized”…”Angels” provide the “beginning” to a new life with less strife…Little boy learns to read and write…Each night his eyes close, confident with path he’s chosen…Connected by the beams of light in the night sky…A wondrous sight indeed…Yet thoughts in his mind continue to chide him for a reason we will all see…But for now he drifts into a peaceful sleep…Mother tucks him in…For a little boy requires love to become a man…Love is often the last piece that stands to fall when all else is lost…

As the days pass…

Little boy keeps learning more about the world…His thoughts shaped by those who teach…Molded into a human being with a belief that can never be breached…Now preaches to the princes and paupers on how to live proper…Surrogate father approves of this “son” and wonders if he could be another one…A beacon of hope to the masses…A hero…

“Do you want to be a hero?”

“Do you want unmatched praise?”

He offered him a way towards unlimited praise that would permeate through all the societal cracks and crevices…the beginning of his genesis into a legend…He makes the suggestion…Little boy’s mind, heart, and soul are now all torn…What to do…? What to do…?

I…I choose…

Surrogate father prepares him for more lessons to learn in this life…Shares heart-wrenching stories of sin and redemption…Little boy feels so much apprehension…realizes the only way his ascension would be secured would be to endure this “rite of passage”…

Starts to learn a Sacred Text…Passage after passage…Perfecting his inflections…Never ending attention is paid towards each divine line…He becomes a mental scribe…He trains his thoughts towards the words of “God”?

Very experimental. Not comfortable writing about this, but combination of life experiences, stories, and namesake song have inspired this.

Intro: Not having a child don’t make her less than a woman…She still has so much love to give…

Another day…Another wish…
She teems with so much love…
But she can’t conceive a child…
For she was scarred during a conflict…Never will get a chance to give birth…
Now no one wanted to get to know her…She was considered less than the rest…
Each night she wept…
Asking…”Why me?”
“I have so much love to give…”
She’s an amazing, caring woman…

However one child sees…she too has no one to love her…
For she is an orphan…This amazing woman sees her…
Holds her hand…
Two burdens lift…
The gift of love is exchanged…

Another day…Another wish…
A mother has a child she loves so much…Husband wonders…
“Yes…I do…”
“But I wish for a child in a different way…”
“A child who is all alone should have someone to love…”
“No child should look above and hope to have a mom and dad”
He grows nervous over how his wife sees the purpose of love…
To share with all that you can…

She wishes to share by holding close a little boy’s hand…
He feels at ease…For he has someone to trust…
Someone to love as a mom…

Imagine a World

Posted: December 15, 2015 in Poetry
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

Intro: Finally complete. A wish that we all have..
Original post: https://silentscholar.com/2014/03/16/imagine-a-world-draft/

“Imagine a World” {Fair}
Intro: Imagine a world that is different from today

Imagine a world where you could live without fear…
Imagine a world where are your loved ones are near…
Not gone…
Always a place to belong…
No true nomads…
For all over the world…
There’s always a place to call home…

Imagine a world where all infants survive…
To see the age of five…
Where no one is no longer deprived…
Of their right to life…
Imagine that kid mixing sand and sticks…
Gets that chance to become something big…
A scientist?
A teacher?
Or a just living sibling…
Humans kindling beautiful thoughts and dreams…
No more nightmares…
For now life has now become fair…

Imagine the days…
Now they pass without that sense of sadness…
Replaced with smiles and laughter…
Often wondering when the sun will set…
And the night light begins to bless…
Knowing all too well…
That now we can rest…
And dream of innocence…

Imagine…
Wake up to a world without those lines…
That have divided us into nations and tribes…
As identity has become fluid…
No more purists…
Or antimiscegenists…
For we’ve grown past those lies…
That say one group has the right…
Over This (me)…
This (land)…
This (World)…

Whether One God….
Or Many or None…
Parts of a whole we shall become…
Imagine a World…
___

Ignored

Posted: November 27, 2015 in Poetry
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

It’s true…
Feel like an outcast among strangers…
Common memory makers mark me with malaise…
My own “state” migrates with me wherever I go…
Forever being “The Other”…
Unable to slow…
Stay…
Wait…
My days repeat…
Don’t know what it means to be happy…
For the pursuit ends with me being on my knees…
Begging the Lord for some semblance of peace…
But how I see peace runs against all they see…
They don’t want me to be part of their humanity…
No one does!
Hence I’m left with so much love…
Unable to share with anyone!
For I have been judged…
Without one word being spoken…

Please don’t fear the way I am…
I only wish to make some friends…
I only wish to be your friend…

Turn their backs away…
Away…

Inflection

Posted: November 3, 2015 in Poetry
Tags: , , , , , , , , ,

The daily reminder…
Your sweetness…
Ever so presence…

The mind…
The me…
The memories…
All that I’ve perceived…
Over all the time I’ve known you…
Leads me to believe…

But what stands out about you…
Amongst this tapestry of beings…
Is it only because you’ve chosen me?
Or were we fated to be…
As choice never seems so just me…
Influenced by all of you…
Each piece…

This unique thing I can’t explain…
Something only you have…
Beyond the smile…
Beyond the touch…
The sounds…
The love…
All bound to this unique thing…

That is redefined…
Each time you show me…
Yet another reason why…
You’re the only one for me…

If only you can witness my prayers…
Each night…
Thankful for having you by my side…
For without your touch…
Your sounds…
Life could never suffice…

Intro: A very different take on the word Soliloquy. Was wondering if the prayers of a person ever get answered.
Or are we just screaming into the wind? As there may not be something or someone out there…

All prayers should be…
The voice of a human…
Sounds of the Divine…

Try my best to understand…
The Divine plans…
Hour after hour…
Calling out Your Name in vain…
Still spend each night in prayer…

While the faithless ones point and laugh…
Claim me to be a fool…
And each day claim me to be the proof…
A clown who chooses to be duped…
By tales of Your greatness…

Pacing back and forth…
Asking the Lord why won’t you grant…
The demands of this penniless peasant man…
Your presence…
All Blank!
Reach me!?

Instead You seem to aggrieve me…
Over even the little good deeds…!
Of which I receive no peace…
Only brief fleeting moments of hope…
Shattered as soon as I get this close…

Feel abandoned by the Divine and fellow man…
The echo of love felt throughout…
Now an endless drought…
With no hope…
No choice…
But to shout…!

And receive no sound…
Only the signs that You don’t care…
Lost forever on my own…
While they all witness me fall…

One day…
Just one day…
One place…
Where we could be together again…
Where past

Could press my “fuzz” upon your smooth skin..
And Wish the woes away…
And restate with grace…
How much in love we are…
On this one day…

For one day…
All has been right…

But who am I to believe…?
To wish…
For what will never be…
For what only I’ve seen..
For this me isn’t me…
Real me can’t appease…
Real me must believe…
That being me is enough for you and me to be…

I pray…
All praise is to The Supreme…
To bring forth my selfish dreams…
You to be with me…
Even if you don’t wish us to be…
Heaven must be…
Heaven tells me…

My heaven…?