Posts Tagged ‘Life’

Intro: A continuation of the story…

Mystical Prayers I – https://silentscholar.com/2017/10/20/mystical-prayers/

Mystical Prayers II – https://silentscholar.com/2018/03/27/mystical-prayers-ii/

 

This day…
This day…
Finally…
The voices are so clear…
Heart is so full of fear…
Couple dozen years…
Replay so near…
Cold metallic object…
Pressed on my skin…
Wondering what will happen…
If I chose to do the deed…
Voices plead…
Yes!
No!
Yes!
No!

Torn between those two sounds…
Torn between two beams of light…
One with a dark hue…
While the other burns so bright…
What path shall I choose…?

I don’t know!
Fall to my knees…
Begging someone…
Something…
Please answer me!

Faith tells me You are the One…
Yet here I am…
Hearing nothing as I call out…
Why am I even me…?
Don’t understand why I even came to be…
Why couldn’t you just silence me…?
That day when I first cried…
Now it’s this day…

I see heavy rains…
In these puddles I see…
Reflections of my misery…
Yet in the background…
The frowns…
Ever so present…
Ever so resound…
Take much of my days…

Till this day…
All seems strange…
All of a sudden rains go away…
But puddles remain…
Past pieces of memories…
Palm deep and dirty to the touch…
But for once…
The reflections change…
I see smiles…
I see love…

Push Pull

Posted: June 19, 2018 in Poetry
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Always been told…
You’re there for me…
Whenever I need…
Yet so many times…
You take me on some ride…
Telling me this and that…
Only to go silent…
Stop…
Push me out…

Fall to the floor…
No map to get back to…
After giving so much time and energy for you…
Only made to be left alone…
In this biting cold…
Wandering….

Till I see this light…
Coming towards me…
I try to follow…
But stuck in my place…
Closer and closer…
Recognize that face…
Pulls me back in…

To share all the new and past pains…
For my words heal and help maintain…
Your resolve…
But at what cost to me…
Not knowing how long I’ll be party…
Before being parted with…
Pushed back to loneliness…

Intro: This continues the tale from before.
https://silentscholar.com/2017/10/20/mystical-prayers/

The voices continue…

Prayers are supposed to solve all…
Yet here I am all alone…
Voice still so soft…
About to blow…
And give it all up…
These petals are all plucked…
Left flushed with all this lost love…
Their voices tell me it’s enough!!
Give up…

If not then give in…
And let the pain win…
They don’t care…
Fate don’t care..
What’s up there…
Ignores all your cries…
Prayers are all denied…
Now The spirits require sacrifice…
Pay the price…
That will set you free…
From all those needs…

The need for love…
The wish for happiness…
Give in…
These are your prayers answered…
Listen…
Voices speak…
Do the deed…

This world we live in…
Whose prejudged the course of 7 Billion souls…
Before so many have even been born…
Based on birth date place and face…
Skin tones make or break one’s fate…
As if many even have a chance…?
This world doesn’t give damn…
In fact they plan…

Behind the scenes…
Malicious malevolent human beings with evil tendencies…
Who care for only the green…
Feed off the pain and misery…
Say it themselves…
As they flaunt their wealth…

Leaving the majority in literal poverty…
Exploiting mental slavery…
While I’m supposedly freeing my mind…
Yet here I am, still engaged in this depraved matrix…
Just another faceless statist…
With no basis to justify my own life…
At the cost of so many others who try!
And fail because this world isn’t fair…

Mystical Prayers

Posted: October 20, 2017 in Poetry
Tags: , , , , , , , ,

Feeling the spirits scream…
The voices proclaim…
That you are out of place…
You don’t fit amongst them…
Come back to us..

But how can I…?
I still have their desires…
Still need and want all…
Walls come closer…
With just one outlet…
One light…
Blinded by what’s just beyond…
Drawn…

Yet other spirits scream…
Tinged with a familiar voice…
Faint…
No not a voice…
Echos of past choices…
And what I’ve seen…
Read and dread what I may do tonight…

Who are you…?
Today I was all smiles…
But now those voices tell me…
Only one deed can set me free…
But what about them…?
Being different hurts…

But they don’t hate you…
But they don’t care too…
Pacing knowing no one loves me…
Praying…
Praying for what they have…
Praying one day I can stand…
And proclaim…
I belong…

Intro:
This is a reimagining of a previous writing: https://silentscholar.com/2014/10/26/choose-life-i/
This time with just one voice as often there is only one.
__

As I Balance the Scales…
Between Faith and Fate…
Which carries more weight…
At this time and place…
Trace back to this one face…

On my knees with a Holy Book in hand…
Wondering which verse and path…
Leads to a promised land…
But seems fate has other plans…
As my soul only knows days…
Filled with pain that dare me to break…
Beg and ask…
Where are you!?

Page by page I read…
Of miracles witnessed by Holy beings…
Whom I believe…
Each word leads me to dream…
Yet ends in another day breathing…
For no damn reason..!

Faith decreasing ever so…
So close to closing this book…
That took all my pain prayers…
Perhaps in vain…
As there is something strange…
When I turn each page…
Words will me to stay…
“Ar-Rahman”…
Blessed in so many ways…
Believe in better days…

Don’t let your life’s light dim…
Embrace it…
Keep it warm and shining for all times..
Recite line after line of tears & trials…
Even when no voice responds…
You have your own life’s story to hold onto…
The story of…
Finding my place…
Finding fate…
Through faith…